The Bombest Documentary I Ever Did See...

I saw a wild documentary about two months ago. It was a bout a war on a savannah in Africa. But it wasn't a war with weapons and people; it was a war between the predators of the savannah. See, as it is with most things in life, there's a balance of power that exists between predators on the savannah. But this documentary is an account of what happened when a famine disintegrated the established hierarchy and it was every creature for itself.

The key players, in order of predatorial rank, are as follows:

The Pride of Lions; The Pack of Hyenas; The Solitary Leopard; The Solitary Cheetah; The Pack of Wild Dogs; The Scavenger Vultures.

This is how the predators are normally ranked, not just by man, but according to each other; for instance, an animal of the lower rank will usually retreat from a carcass in the presence of a predator of higher rank for his own sake. But the only reason these "peace demonstrations" go on is because there is food to go around... When famine hits the savannah, the prey that the predators feed on starve or leave the area and food becomes sparse. Thus, war breaks out over the meager servings left, and the hierarchy becomes unstable.

So who emerges as the biggest winner? Well, there are several battles, skirmishes, and negotiations waged to declare a "wartime king". I will now review several of them:

The Pride of Lions vs. The Pack of Hyenas
When I saw the Lion King as a youngster, I thought beef between lions and hyenas was a bogus concept, assuming, "no competition". I was pleasantly surprised to learn that the animosity between lions and hyenas was very real and that hyenas were very serious competition. There was a skirmish between a group of lionesses on the hunt and a pack of hyenas that actually led to a lioness casualty!

But then I discovered the trump card of the pride: the male lion. It wasn't the first time, but they refer to the male lion as "the hyena-killer". When he arrives, it's no longer a competition between the pride and the pack; it's a one-man show and he takes no prisoners. The male lion broke the backs of several hyenas.

In one cruel scene, a hyena pup is injured and incapacitated, not providing a meal or a threat to any of the lions. The male lion hears it's yelp, and out of sheer animosity sneaks up on it and breaks its neck and leaves it to rot. Victory - The Pride of Lions

The Pack of Hyenas vs. The Pack of Wild Dogs
The Wild Dog Pack is a funny bunch. They're not the fastest, nor are they the strongest predators on the savannah; they're the most tenacious and persistent. They don't catch their usually much faster prey; they simply chase it until it gets tired. They've got guts to be so small though, and it's shown when they battle the Pack of Hyenas. The size difference is obvious, with the hyenas being larger and stronger. But the wild dogs challenge the hyenas anyway.

To be so small, the wild dogs take hits fairly well and make a competition of the match without inflicting much damage on their opponents. But, out of sheer hopelessness, the dogs eventually relent and find food elsewhere, as they're a very mobile, nomadic group compared to the more territorial hyenas. Victory - The Pack of Hyenas

The Solitary Leopard vs. The Pride of Lions
This was a beautiful encounter. On the books, the Solitary Leopard is outnumbered and outgunned physically by even the smallest member of the Pride. But the Leopard has one advantage: it's hunting method. When it gets it's jaws on prey, it uses it's powerful hind legs to climb the nearest tree and feast in peace. This made for an interesting turn of events... The confrontation with the Pride was actually an indirect one. The lionesses were in another skirmish with hyenas for the remains of a medium-sized prey. The leopard took advantage of the opportunity and stole the prey, retreating to the nearest tree as usual.

Most of the time, this would be the end of the conflict and the lionesses would find food elsewhere. But the famine pressures one lioness to climb the tree as well and retrieve the prey. The leopard only threatens, but allows the lioness to take her prey back. But there is an ironic twist: on the way down the tree, the lioness finds that she is not equipped like the leopard to tow heavy prey and make climbs. As she descends the tree, she slips and breaks her back on a branch. She dies instantly, dangling with her foot caught in the tree!

Need more shock? The next day, the pride of lionesses returns to retrieve their fellow lioness' body... and eat it... The leopard doesn't get the meal, but he does demonstrate his dominion over the higher reaches. Victory - The Solitary Leopard

The Scavenger Vultures vs. The Solitary Leopard
The Scavenger Vultures had a rough time during this famine; after all, in a famine where are you really gonna find leftovers? In this incident, the leopard attempts to feast on a carcass too big for it to move on it's own. Since it can't move it, it attempts to eat it right where it is. But the vultures see the opportunity and begin to make aggressions toward the leopard. Of course the leopard is stronger, but it is solitary and it can't fend off all the vultures at once. What occurs is a stalemate; the vultures feast on one side, the leopard feasts on the other. Draw Match

The Solitary Cheetah vs. The Pack of Hyenas
This is one of the biggest upsets of the War on the savannah. The Solitary Cheetah, though regarded highly as one of the premier big cats for its speed, is not a very fierce competitor. There is a confrontation between a few hyenas and a cheetah over a carcass. Ordinarily, all it takes is a strong opponent or several opponents to make a cheetah depart; after all, departing is its department because who could catch it, right? But in a freakish turn of events, the situation becomes a standoff: the fast but unarmed cheetah versus the power and teeth of the hyenas!

The cheetah begins to put on the biggest bluff in the world! It guards the carcass with ferocity, biting into it one moment, and darting at the encroaching hyena pack the next moment. Should all out combat have broken out, the cheetah would have surely been defeated. But this act was enough to convince the hyenas it was not worth it to pursue the carcass! That's even more significant considering that there is a famine and food is scarce; I would liked to have seen a conflict erupt to see if the cheetah was truly bluffing. Victory - The Solitary Cheetah

The Pride of Lions vs. The Solitary Cheetah
The Solitary Cheetah got lucky on one occasion, but the famine didn't make it totally crazy. One incident found it standing between it's newly captured meal and the encroaching Pride of Lions. The cheetah may have been perturbed, but it didn't show it. It gracefully bowed to it's physical and numerical superior without a fight. Victory - The Pride of Lions


Now I present my verdict. Judging by the adaptations of the predators involved and the results of the various battles that ensued on the savannah, I surmise that in "war times" of famine, the Solitary Leopard is the King of the savannah. This is due to the adaptation of carrying its prey into the trees where it is inaccessible to the average predator without large risk.

The Wartime Hierarchy: The Solitary Leopard; The Pride of Lions; The Pack of Hyenas/The Solitary Cheetah; The Pack of Wild Dogs; The Scavenger Vultures.

I'm gonna try to catch that documentary again, because I think I missed a skirmish between the leopard (with its mate) and the hyena pack that also resulted in a leopard victory. Don't you find something symbolic about the way leopards survive by taking their prey into trees...

Jesus PeaceB-)